Power is a dangerous thing. It can make a person crazy, wild and vicious. It can make you do irrational things and sometimes make poor decisions. It can be like an evil villain depending on who has it. (I am not speaking of myself…never.)

It also can be wielded nicely. (This is me.) It can be used brilliantly as a tool on a complicated piece of machinery. It also can be the building block to many bigger things. Power is the control some of us need to make our lives move forward.

Our house has a great balance of power. The outside seems to be my husband’s jurisdiction.   He flourishes in making decisions about the lawn and bigger house projects. He takes out the garbage and recycling. Hubby is even in charge of getting the mail and the paper. He does share some of the decision making with me especially when it comes to the garden. (Okay, I let him think he has some say but I’m really in charge of this area.)

I, on the other hand, play the stereotypical 1950’s housewife role and take on the household jurisdictions. I clean, shop and organize. I shoulder the responsibility of a messy house at times but kind of like it this way.

Every now and then, he’ll do my stuff and I’ll do his but overall we don’t cross the line and it works for us. For example, I do most of the laundry but I will give Hubby a lot of credit for folding and putting stuff away. (You should see him roll socks and fold undies!)

There is only one area where crossover of power is strongly fought for…the kitchen! I brandish most of the power in the kitchen with food decisions. I just made myself laugh by typing the word “most.” It is a rare day that he goes into the pantry without me asking, “Where did you get that?”  And then I sigh.

He does have a pantry shelf that he can find “husband approved snacks” but other than that I hover over him and dictate. For the most part, Hubby is good with this arrangement EXCEPT for food that lies in a gray area of “HIS” vs. “HERS.”

Sometimes I have extra special ingredients in the pantry with the intention of using them in a recipe. A problem will arise when my husband goes into the pantry and just eats what he wants. (How dare he eat the food in his own home?  Yep, I’m a tyrant!)

In his defense, I should communicate better. In my defense, um, I really don’t have a defense. I just feel that this is my pantry and I am great and powerful. (Sort of like that guy in the Wizard of Oz behind the curtain….except I don’t have a mustache.)

All of this came to my mind this week because of the recipe I wanted to post…peanut butter sauce. I had used it on my spring rolls a couple of weeks ago and have had some requests to post a recipe.

The problem…..someone got into the peanut butter!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!   It really shouldn’t be a big deal EXCEPT that I didn’t have a good picture of my sauce for this blog. The only picture I had was one (see above) that makes it look gloopy.

This is one of those times where I “may” have overreacted. My husband has a lot of Pavlovian responses to various foods but I’m afraid the next time someone offers him something with peanut butter he may start shaking and rock in the corner.

With that said, this is my formal public apology to my husband. You may eat anything in the pantry and I will not utter a sound. (Now the fridge is a still my jurisdiction!!!)

Peanut Sauce for dipping spring rolls or chicken satay


Sesame oil

2 tsp minced garlic

2 tsp minced ginger

½ – 1 Tbsp Thai red curry paste (not powder…PASTE)

1 Tbsp brown sugar

¾ cup peanut butter

½ cup coconut milk (unsweetened)

½- 1 Tbsp Fish sauce (this is a tasting thing)

Juice from ½ a lime


In a non-reactive saucepan, heat up a swirl of sesame oil over medium heat. Add the garlic and ginger and give it a minute or two. You aren’t browning anything; you just want the fragrance to hit your nose.

NOTE BEFORE YOU ADD THE CURRY….curry paste can be hot for some people. If you aren’t used to using it, only add a little. The sauce will taste great either way.

Add the curry, brown sugar and peanut butter. Mix it up as well as you can. SLOWLY add the coconut milk.. Whisk until it is all one beautiful creamy sauce.

Keep this up for a couple of minutes. You may need to lower the heat, it shouldn’t be bubbling.

Remove from heat. Whisk in the lime. Taste.   Do you need some salt? Slowly add some fish sauce.

I used crunchy peanut butter and the nuts made it a little salty so I only needed a dash of fish sauce. I still think you need a dash no matter what because it adds such a neat flavor.

I went out and bought more peanut butter yesterday. I bought two…his and hers.